Say It To Lucy

Dear Lucy,

I am a 47-year-old single female. I have a great career and my children are grown and gone. I have no money problems, addictions, or  problems of any kind.

Well, except one. I have a male friend who is kind and gentle. He is a lovely man and cares very deeply for me. I like him very much and we have many things in common. Whenever we are together we have a great time. The sex is the best I can ever remember and he is a thoughtful lover.

Here is the problem. He is only 26 years old. He has never been married and has no children. My daughter thinks it is disgusting that we are lovers and he lost a good friend because of his relationship to me.

Are we doing something wrong in having a relationship? We have talked of marriage but have made no plans yet. We need to get this straightened out. He says that he canít live without me and I know my life would be worthless without his bright smile in it.

What should we do?

Loved in Minnesota

Dear Loved,

Being that you both are grown people and have chosen this path is of no concern to anyone else but you. If his friend left him over something stupid like this then he really wasnít a friend.

My advice is that if you two are happy together and are causing no harm to anyone then go for it and donít worry about the others. Your daughter will either come around or she wonít. You lived your life around hers. Now it is your turn to live your life and find happiness.

The simple matter is that there is very little love in this world and if you are lucky enough to find it anywhere, you hang on to it as tight as you can and donít worry about the ones who will tell you no.

Life is swift and soon passes us by. You must live as much as you can in the little time you have and donít worry about what people think. You and he should stay and love each other for as long as possible.

Good Luck,




I am a 30 something white male and I have recently started dating a woman of a different race. I really like this woman, but how do I get past the stereotypes I have had beaten into my head all these years? The last thing I want to do is hurt her with some ignorant remark.

Confused in PA

Dear Confused,

If you really like this woman as you say, you will eventually realize that there are no differences. Talk to her and spend time with her. The longer you do this the more you will not notice the race issue.

You must realize that people are people no matter who they are and no matter where they come from. Obviously there is something to this young woman or you wouldn't be so worried about it.

Spend as much time as possible with her. Be kind and gentle and you will soon be able to overcome your upbringing.

Have fun and relax,



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